Freestylin\\\’

I’m no virgin to the whole “blog-o-sphere” crap. But I will dare to say that I haven’t been posting on here because I no longer enjoy writing about fashion. Even when I was writing for fashion magazines, I was mostly writing about relationships or short stories. Fashion is “haute” and all that, but I am so tired of the industry, and I no longer get excited about blabbing about it. The only fun thing to do is rag about people’s lack of style, but even now I think that’s not interesting. I was talking to my co-worker today about Berlin and how accepting people tend to be over there, even in regards to how you dress. It made me think about the post I wrote about my guy friends who get scared of getting beat up by frat boys because they decide to wear cardigans and leggings.

Anyway, I am changing the theme of this “fashionista” blog. It’s going to be more about relationships, lifestyle, dating, sex… that stuff interests me more anyway. The “fashion” part will be more of an accessory (har har). Maybe it will spark the intro of an entry. Bring it on!

My other blog is about toddler news, which is REALLY REALLY depressing by the way. Of course the only toddler news that makes Google news are deaths and Suri Cruise.

RIP, Mr. Fred Rogers. Did you ever know that those knit sweaters you would hang so neatly in your closet would pave the way for the young and hip of today?

A young man and his friend asked me today if cardigans were still “in”. That was such a difficult question for me to answer, because often in fashion you are dealing with multiple levels of “in”-ness. As stupid as that sounds, it really is what happens.

For instance, gaucho pants? They are not “in”, nor have they ever been “in”, from a designer standpoint. They give off camel toe, they are unflattering, they look frumpy — they just aren’t as flattering as tailored pants. It’s like a common joke with the fashionistas — “Yeah, that’s hideous, but at least they’re not gaucho pants.” However, these pants struck a chord with midwest women a few years ago and the debocle of a trend stayed with them for a long ass time. So, in a sense, they were “in” in those circlese in the midwest.

Then you also have the idea of “in” being mainsteam. Whatever you see plastered on bebe.com or what you see on an Express mannequin. Maybe you are thinking to yourself, “Hey, that’s kinda cool. It’s popping up everywhere.”

Then there’s the “in” of American Apparel, a company that tends to bring back old trends that we made fun of back in the day, but they resurrect it in a way like it was never living before. Usually, especially in the midwest, the trend gets made fun of, but then it catches on in a big way in a year, but by then the company has moved on. High waisted leggings are an excellent example of this, especially the sparkly ones. Now all the sorority sisters are loving them, all the way down to the sophomore in high school. But now the company has moved on to highlighter, acid wash, and bagginess.

So, that makes the answer to the cardigan question… cardigans are still “in”, they’ll be around for awhile, but as far as being “fresh” or ahead of the game, they are not.

I forgot my point.

My point is that cardigans are pretty safe, but if you are trying to stay ahead of the game, you might want to move on. Puppets used as gloves maybe? It worked for Mr. R.

This just in, owning an SUV — especially a Hummer — is a fashion faux pas. NPR’s words, not mine.

A fashion faux pas.

Interesting. Also? A recent survey mentioned on NPR stated that women will be much more interested in talking to a guy with a hybrid rather than a sports car. How much more likely? 9 times out of 10. My boyfriend did not believe this. Honestly, after the 80’s, when have sports cars been sexy anyway? I tend to want to flip-off a sports car rather than want to hump its owner. Hybrids are interesting in theory, but when they develop a way to turn trash (not new food) into fuel, then let’s talk. Neither are that impressive. How does the subject come up at the bar, anyway, without one of the people coming off as an uber-lame ass-clown? “Hey, I-uh, noticed you drove up in that Prius. That’s really, really admirable. So are your underpants made of recycled materials also?” Or, “So, foxy lady. You wanna go for a ride with the top down? My Porsche has your name written all over it.” Ugh. Seriously.

I’ve never had a love relationship with cars, it’s mostly been hate. Attribute my never having a driver’s license to that. My only car love was an ‘88 Buick Regal that got laid to rest two years ago. She was a gas guzzling boat that I drove (ahem) with a driver’s permit. But like I’ve always said, it’s the unhealthy relationships that we cherish the most.

The concept of “going green” as a fashion statement rather than having it be a conscious effort to save our environment just has “wrong” leaking oil all over it. What happens when the trend is over, then?

People tend to have a love hate relationship with girls with short dos. Some consider it a don’t, while others have a strict preference for the pixies. My take?

The current answer is HOT HOT HOT. I’m going short a la Jean Seberg in Breathless, the indie-mother of all American in Paris films. I was surprised to learn that a couple other of my friends are going the super-short route as well.

Photo courtesy gonemovie.com.
Drinking Shandies (not bousgie) with my friend J over some garlic shrimp (bousgie) pizza, we were discussing our desire to crop our locks with the risky new “it” look.

“I like it,” she said. “It gives me an excuse to dress like a slut.”

I, on the other hand, like the ambiguous gender look. Especially lovable: My son won’t be able to yank my hair into bruised oblivion!

This month, Fashionista Today is going to be going through a change in lifestyle — blogstyle — you know what I mean. I originally started this blog with the intentions of blogging specifically about fashion. However, I want to open the scope to issues of interest to stylish women who aren’t quite single. While I’m not only a parent, but a partner — I still hold lots of interest in relationships and how they work and don’t work. Stylin’ is always going to be a part of my life, so that’s not going to drop. Why keep these issues separate when a woman can be all of that in one package?

I get irritated when I immediately get defined by others as a mother, and a mother only. Yes, I am a mother, but I’m also a girlfriend. I am also a partner, a daughter, a sister. I have a sweet tooth the size of my head and neck. I’m a writer and a critic. I’m also criticized! I’m a designer, a Capricorn, an aetheist, and a person of color. I am right handed and stubborn. I’m someone who doesn’t know how to drive a stick shift. I’m a strong supporter of homebirthing and midwives.

So, what exactly is a fashionista (today) really about? Fashion, fashioning, being fashioned after… it’s not all about clothes and designer labels. It’s about creation, shape, style — quirkiness. Some of it is charming, some of it is cool, some of it is extremely eccentric.

So, I am not embarrassed to admit that I at first Hate Watched the Sex and the City a few years ago, but then I became a fan on the DL, then an out-in-the-open fan — but a self-loathing one.

Hate Watching is an interesting sub-category to “hating” — something even the best of us are guilty of.

What is it with our intrinsic interests in things we loathe? I really want to go in depth about this idea. From hate-dating (dating a person you completely detest!), to hate watching, to even the irony of wearing fashion you hate… it’s a very interesting idea.

I can tell you one thing though: I do not hate crocs and gaucho pants enough to wear them.

The transition into spring will bring some of our favorite looks out of the closet. Nothing is as cool as a great pair of denim jeans, ready for any season. Vintage Levi’s are interesting to me. I’m not a vintage jeans fanatic, but I do see the treasure hunt for rare authentic pieces to be interesting. How is one able to tell that the pair of Levi’s found at a secondhand shop could be old enough to have adorned James Dean?

How to spot vintage Levi’s:
1.) Levi stopped printing their brand name in capital letters in 1971. Those shopping for vintage Levi jeans should check the label for what collectors call “The Big E”.

2.) The 1955 Levi’s use Scovill zippers. Even Levi’s own vintage reproduction jeans do not use these zippers.

3.) Offset belt loop as seen on 501xx models 1950-66

4.) Hidden copper rivet used on 501xx models 1937-66

5.) Suspender buttons on pre war s501xx, used 1922-36

6.) Redline selvage and heavy chainstitch cuff used until 1983

You can’t get more classic than boasting a pair of vintage Levis. While Levi’s currently has a stylish 2008 Spring/Summer collection, you can still find the real deal out there.

Once you’ve snagged a pair of delicious vintage denim, it’s time to dress it up! Play with the classic tank and jeans look by choosing a ribbed tank in a bright color in time for spring (maybe American Apparel’s 3308 in Grass), or a pair of sneakers in a playful vibe. Or just Ebay it. You can make a killing on a good pair.

The book that was pivotal into my journey to parenthood was Misconceptions by Naomi Wolfe. My best friend got it for me. It is the book that helped me decide to work with a midwife, and ultimately have a homebirth. It also opened my eyes to the real and realistic side of childbirth.

Definitely, after having a baby, everything changes. It’s futile to write that because nobody can imagine it unless they’ve had a child. For instance, the scene in Trainspotting where the baby dies is a million times more affecting to me now. Anyway, in the book Misconceptions, a father decides to take on the mother’s duties for a day and he realizes how much work she does. I was thinking about this when my partner told me that he had watched our son for two weeks while he was on vacation. That wasn’t true. He watched our son for 39 hours each week while he was on vacation. 39 hours does not equal 1 week. I would really like to advise partners who have a stay-at-home partner to be compassionate and consider the extreme stress and loss-of-self that they are enduring. I’m trying to keep it real, as much as I love my son and what he brings to my life, sometimes I feel the loneliest I’ve ever felt.

I see other mothers around me in this half-ass town I live in, and even in those circles, I still feel like the odd man out. It’s because I like clothes, I have a partner who commutes, I don’t tend house, I like to go out to cafes and eat. The time I spend with my son makes me incredibly happy, and I’m not going to lie — it is taxing as a mofo. I get no break from him while my partner is commuting to work four days out of the week. And also, since I am breastfeeding, it is difficult for me to find alternative care for him at this point. I am determined to make it a year breastfeeding because that’s what’s best for him.

I’m not a single parent because I have a partner.

However, I am by myself as a parent four days out of the week.

Meaning, I watch over my son 24/7 — he even goes to work with me! In my work situation, I make the schedule, so I am able to give myself many hours during the time that my partner is home for the weekend, and give myself less hours during the week.

It is definitely a lifestyle adjustment, because when I go out (and I go out to treat myself) I have to make sure that the places I am going are baby friendly — the worst is when a bathroom doesn’t have a changing table. I usually just find a private spot to drop his trou and get him changed, but sometimes I’ve had to resort to sitting on a toilet and changing him on my lap.

The most challenging thing is giving him the attention he needs and deserves while I work and meet my goals for myself and for my work environment. This is actually kind of disastrous.

I went with my boyfriend to watch the new Sex and the City movie. When the movie let out, I took a look at who was exiting the theater with us, and was slightly surprised to see a few men among the crowd.

I wasn’t really disappointed in the movie, although my boyfriend and I were disappointed in Miranda’s comment about following “the white guy” with the baby because that’s where she wanted to live — where the white guy with a baby was living.

The fashion was hot, New York was hot, Big’s full name is John James Preston! The movie was fine, but later we went to watch the Pistons game where they lost. The guy sitting next to my boyfriend saw his Sex and the City movie ticket. Funny!