Freestylin\\\’

The book that was pivotal into my journey to parenthood was Misconceptions by Naomi Wolfe. My best friend got it for me. It is the book that helped me decide to work with a midwife, and ultimately have a homebirth. It also opened my eyes to the real and realistic side of childbirth.

Definitely, after having a baby, everything changes. It’s futile to write that because nobody can imagine it unless they’ve had a child. For instance, the scene in Trainspotting where the baby dies is a million times more affecting to me now. Anyway, in the book Misconceptions, a father decides to take on the mother’s duties for a day and he realizes how much work she does. I was thinking about this when my partner told me that he had watched our son for two weeks while he was on vacation. That wasn’t true. He watched our son for 39 hours each week while he was on vacation. 39 hours does not equal 1 week. I would really like to advise partners who have a stay-at-home partner to be compassionate and consider the extreme stress and loss-of-self that they are enduring. I’m trying to keep it real, as much as I love my son and what he brings to my life, sometimes I feel the loneliest I’ve ever felt.

I see other mothers around me in this half-ass town I live in, and even in those circles, I still feel like the odd man out. It’s because I like clothes, I have a partner who commutes, I don’t tend house, I like to go out to cafes and eat. The time I spend with my son makes me incredibly happy, and I’m not going to lie — it is taxing as a mofo. I get no break from him while my partner is commuting to work four days out of the week. And also, since I am breastfeeding, it is difficult for me to find alternative care for him at this point. I am determined to make it a year breastfeeding because that’s what’s best for him.

Trackback URI | Comments RSS